Peace in Her Prayers

We sat in grass
Brown like her feet
She with her limes and me with sweets
Neither having peace
But for the other.

We saw things past
In things that are
While we waited
Looking within, while reaching above
For more

Her whispered prayers
Carried like the leaves we didn't trap
On soft winds to sunsets
Till they came back
Answering her with promises of better things.

I wrote this for the then-new year 2009. I reminded myself of it today for the days left of this year and those to come in the new one.

Peace and Love
-Keeta :)

A Little Thought

There are times in life when you may lose yourself, but allow the memories of what has been to give you the light to remind you where you've been and where you are. Then you move forward.

Peace & Love
-Keeta :)

Standing me at my worst for the best

Its been a while and I apologize. There are times when life takes up so much breathing room that you are unable to indulge in the things that allow you to exhale, such as blogging for instance. And though my breath is still somewhat bated at the moment, I have decided to exhale a little, so that I may 1. retain my sanity and 2. speak about something that has been on my mind lately (as usual).

I was on Twitter, as I have taken to doing numerous times throughout the day (since technology has afforded me with the means for such luxuries) and I saw a tweet (aka post for u non-Twitter folks) from one of my long-time friends (she's rhytswell on Twitter if u want to follow her. Fabulous girl.). The tweet was a quote from Marilyn Monroe that has been on mind since I read it. It said: "...if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best". I had to chuckle because she said it just like I would probably have said something like that (love a woman with some spunk) and that statement summed up how I've been feeling in the last few weeks.

Have you ever really sat and thought about the people who can handle you at your worst and how they stick with you through the worst times? The people who see you at breaking point and know that they don't have to say anything they just have to be there, who know and understand that sometimes what may seem like anger is simply frustration, who accept your vices and even appreciate some of them.

When the dust settles and my guard doesn't have to be up and my smile and peace-of-mind return, these persons deserve all of that and so much more. Because like anything worthwhile, it was there in the good and bad times. So the persons reading this, you know yourselves and I want you to know that I am grateful for you and I will do like Anita Baker said and give you the best I got because you deserve it.

For my fabulous readers, make sure you recognize and appreciate the fabulous people you have in your life, because sometimes they're the only duct tape or staples to keep you together when everything is crumbling.

Peace and Love (and I promise not to stay away for so long again *grin*)
-Keeta :)

(For CR, MFFN, JM, JR xoxox)

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Learning to Let Go

Today was a day filled with bittersweet feelings. One of my besties, affectionately known as Meg Bunny, will be leaving today for school in Cuba for 7 years. While I wish her all the best, coupled with the fact that I feel an immense sense of pride that she achieved a full scholarship to study for her dream career, I felt sad at the same time.

As much as I have always been in situations where I have had to say goodbye, I've never been good at letting go. Especially when the person I had to let go was leaving for a long time to go somewhere far away. The day she told me she was leaving, I bawled *chuckle* (sometimes I'm a cryer) to the point where another friend who saw me thought someone close to me had died. I think I reacted the way I did because she has been a constant source of support and love for the last 8 months in particular and I started to think of the gap that would be there (made worse by the restrictions to free-flowing communication with Cuba). Then I saw this picture and I found it so funny and thought it ironic that it was 1. posted the same day I found out she was leaving and 2. the chipmunk and accompanying caption captured my feelings perfectly (plus he looked so cute). After looking at it for a while I felt much better and decided that while I would still be sad that she would be leaving, being overcome with sadness would not be where I would leave things for the time she had left in Jamaica. Over the weeks to follow, I made the effort to talk to her at least once a day, spend extra time with her and other friends, simply to appreciate her a little bit more. And as much as I thought I would cry again yesterday when I saw her for what would be the last time in a long while, and today when she finally said "Bye", I didn't. I realized that doing the extra things helped me learn to let go. So even though I'm sure I will probably have a reaction comprising violent bawling and sadness when next I have to face something like that, I think I've figured out a way to cope effectively (maybe one day I wont cry at all) because this time it's all for the best, so it won't be so bad letting go.

Peace & Luv

-Keeta :)

The Birthday(s) of your life

Glitter Graphics - 2.0 Layouts


September is a very special month to me. My birthday!!! Birthdays are a special time when you, your friends and loved ones celebrate another year that you have been blessed with life. Since my 19th birthday I have increasingly taken to thinking back to the years that have passed. And this year more so that any year thinking of when I was little and the birthdays I had and how my parents made me feel like I was the only little girl that would ever matter in the world. One of the thoughts that followed was not about me, but about someone who has never experienced that.

One of my friends did not know what it was like to have that feeling. Her birthday is close to mine and instead of focusing on what would happen on mine (because I have some friends that always scheme to do something anyway. Love them to pieces) I decided to do some scheming of my own for her. I co-schemed with a friend and we decided to have a picnic for her. Surprise of course (those are the best) at one of her favourite gardens. It was the best thing to see someone who often forgets how special she is remember how amazing her friends think she is.

There is much power in simplicity. We didn't have a lot of $$ but our end result was very well-appreciated nevertheless. A sheet (for sitting), chocolate cupcakes with candles, finger food and a large bottle of juice for the picnic part; coupled with a small gift with a mixture of small, inexpensive but very useful, things in a favourite colour work very well for a gift. The most important thing is being reminded of how important you are.


Now for your own birthday, you don't need to wait on friends. There are little things you can do for yourself that make you feel like that extra million dollars:

For the entire week leading up to your birthday, plan a special outfit for each day and look extra smoking for those 7 days. Yes, this is your special time. If you don't have a lot of cash like the average college student (whether undergrad or postgrad), then there are a few inexpensive things that you can do to make yourself feel like the Queen you are (and you know I am all about the royalty-treatment).

If you can't afford a mani/pedi- Get a pumice stone for your feet, a sponge buffer for your nails, a new colour of nail-polish (pink always works :]) and do it yourself. If you get polish on the skin take a warm bath (after the nail polish has dried of course) and use a loofah/washcloth to gently rub the skin around the nail (hands and toes) to remove the extra polish. Professional look without the money. Rub a little olive oil around the nail after you dry off.

Wash your hair and do a little self-styling that will last for the week. Don't underestimate yourself, once it's not too complicated you can do a little self-styling if you're determined enough.

Wear a little shimmery shadow if you don't wear make-up everyday. If you do wear make-up, give it a little extra punch for the pre-birthdays.

Reminisce about the happy times of the years past. It's even more worth it when you appreciate the happy things and times of when you were younger.

On the day of your birthday, let NOTHING spoil your day. You go through the regular routine every other day of the year so you owe it to yourself to have a perfect day. And even if something less than desired happens, the important thing is that you don't react negatively to it. Surround yourself with persons you love and who the day would not be the same without.

I wish you the very best birthday. Each year is a blessing and in spite of any unfavourable things that have happened in the year, they only make the good times much more special. And because September and October are special months for me and mine an extra special "Happy Birthday" to those persons. Many happy returns.

Peace & Luv
-Keeta :)

A wish for you! Weekend Cookie :)

Have a great day!!

Glitter Graphics - 2.0 Layouts

& an even better weekend!!

Peace & Luv
-Keeta :)

What is Bliss?

I saw this a little earlier tonite and thought it was so cute. Esp when I think of how excited I get about shiny things *smile*

Peace & Luv
-Keeta :)

Being the Bigger Person

Over the last few months, I have experienced numerous changes. One of which has led to the biggest change of all. Though I've been told it doesn't show very much, there is now more Keeta than there was prior to the stressful period (a year and a half ago). 40 lbs more. I bet you thought I meant something else when you read the title? *smile* No, I am simply referring to gaining weight. But the figurative meaning has something to do with this as well.

I gain weight in times of stress, like many other persons I'm sure. Comfort food is a friend, but tomorrow, you wont be feeling too comfortable about it. With the increased weight came increased sensitivity about same. Worse, in an image absorbed society (yes Jamaica is just as bad as the US) I had a lot to come to terms with. I felt very unlike myself for a long time and to make matters worse, the things I tried didn't seem to be helping much.

I remember watching this episode of "What Not to Wear", Stacy advised the makeover recipient to dress for the body she had. More importantly you need to love the body you have, even if it has gotten bigger or smaller and you may not be so happy with the changes. But guess what, I didn't change, just the outside. So I've learnt to appreciate the "bigger" me. So it has made it easier to adjust to the changes I was making.

I rediscovered a fabulous little thing, you have to accept things before changing them. Sounds like a paradox? It isn't. Accepting something as I refer to it here means simply seeing it for what it is. Once you do that, you can move on, make changes, make it better. I know that conventionally "accepting something" means that you come to terms with the way something is and it stays that way. Let's deconstruct what we've been taught for our entire lives. In keeping with that, accepting will mean simply a more intuitive understanding of the situation/thing in question.

So I've accepted the changes (and in the meantime I'm still fab) and I'm making Keeta better. Come on girlies, you can do the same. Let's GO!!!!!

Peace and luv
-Keeta :)

Being the Browning

For most of us who are familiar with Jamaican culture, you are aware of the infamous "Browning". Some kind of seasoning (yes, but that's not what I'm referring to here), some chocolate creation (nope), simply the mixed girl.



In Jamaica there are people who go to all kinds of drastic means to become the so-called fabulous browning. This has led to not only academics having a field day hypothesizing and theorizing about the motivations behind this, but singers and DJs enshrining the browning in the lyrics of dancehall and reggae.

Now I have always wondered about this. Why the fuss? I am but a product of one whole heap a mix up. Being this browning brought with it unwanted attention (at times very creepy) from the opposite sex, misconceptions about my class/status and personality from others. Why though? Darker girls are just as fascinating. But now I have grown to appreciate the other aspects of my mix-up self and the accompanying contradictions that go with it.

A girl who:

1. Loves being neat to the point of obsessive compulsion but who hates to clean.

2. Is extroverted about almost everything not directly related to herself but who is shy and modest at times just the same.

3. Is loud and gaudy with my likes of overly bright colours worse when paired with animal prints but loves clean lines and the style of Grace Kelly.

4. Is a little raunchy like Lil Kim (in her rap days) but in the same breath a subtler sexy like Estelle.

5. Is a workaholic who procrastinates.

6. The girly-girl (pink, puffs and cute) but sports, dirt and grit get me going sometimes too.

And I could go on. But here's the thing with my contradictions, they fit perfectly in the mix up shell of the Browning's body. And if it's one thing I love (as much as I may have a burning need for meticulous order) it's not being put into the proverbial box. So now instead of wishing "Lord, couldnt this browning thing just go away?" I have decided to embrace all that comes with it. Best part I am a legendary part (if you will, Lol) of island culture. Who wouldn't love that?

So to all my Brownings, BIG UP YUHSELF! You're special too.

-Peace & Love,

Keeta :)

ABCs of the Browning

I saw one of these random question things on my friend's blog but it was organized by alphabet and I thought "Hmmm.....I like the arrangement. I think I'll do it". So below find the ABCs of the Browning. And after you read copy and paste your own answers in a comment. I would love to get a peek into my readers' minds as well. Enjoy!

A
- Available: technically, no (won't say a word more about it *wink)
- Age: 22 years
- Annoyance: bad grammar
- Animal: cat (meow)
B
- Beer: No. Cocktail- "Brown Skin Gyal" @ East Japanese Restaurant
- Birthdays: September 19 1986
- Best Friend: Pig, Morgy, Kodi, Kristen
- Blind or Deaf: Neither (thank God).
- Best weather: Sunny days. Even better on Sunday mornings in Mandeville :)
- Been in Love: Mmhmm. It's amazing
- Believe in Magic?: Yes. @ times I float
- Believe in Santa: anyone who gives me PRESENTS!! Lol

C
- Candy: Ferrero Rocher.......Mmmmmmm.
- Color: PINK PINK PINK PINK PINK PINK!!!!!!!
- Chocolate/vanilla: CHOCOLATE!
- Chinese/Mexican Food: Neither. Mommy's cooking
- Cake or pie: Both. I heart a good chocolate/cheesecake tho
- Continent to visit: Europe and Australia
- Cheese: Gimme that cheddar. Lol. Oh yeh and goat cheese (yum)

D

- Day or Night: Depends on who I'm with :)
- Dancing in the rain: Yuh want me catch cold? Lol

E
- Eyes: Hershey Brown
- Ever failed a class: Never. Maybe a test some time in the very distant past.

F
- First thoughts waking up: Is the cable working? Why won't that turtle keep quiet?
- Food: Sushi, pizza, anything with cheese, chocolate, PORK!

G
- Greatest fear: Roaches. Phobia not fear
- Goals: A cosmopolitan/ hippie-on-the-weekend lifestyle with my dark-skinned Adonis husband. Lol. JK. Successful, peaceful life with family and friends close by.
- Gum: Bubblicious Original. Like it for as long as the flavour lasts.
- Get along with your parents: Yep

H
- Hair Color: Chestnut gold
- Height: 5"7
- Happy: Usually
- Holiday: Christmas
- How do you want to die: In my sleep when I'm 90 with my hubby beside me

I
- Ice Cream: Chocolate or mocha
- Instrument: The pen/keyboard. My words are my music

J
- Jewelry: Big and bold with lots of colours. Love my gold heart pendant I received for my 12th birthday
- Job: A whole bunch right now. I guess researcher more than anything.Lol

K
- Kids: Nope
- Kickboxing or karate: Thinking of trying kick-boxing
- Keep a journal: Yep. Sporadic with the entries though.

L
- Love: the best feeling.
- Laughed so hard you cried: Of course. Esp. when I'm around Morgy, Kodak and Nella

M
- Milk flavor: Almond
- Movies: Chick flicks
- Motion sickness: Nope
- McD’s or BK: Neither.

N
- Number: 19

O
- One wish: To see Mommy get the stuff she wants.

P
- Pepsi/Coke: Neither. Angostura Lemon/Lime Bitters
- Perfect Pizza: Pepperoni, bacon and extra cheese

Q
- Question: When?

R
- Reality T.V.: ANTM, HGTV Design Star, any fashion-based reality shows and almost anything MTV produces
- Radio Station: Fame 95
- Roll your tongue in a circle: Mmhmm
- Ring size: 7.5-8

S
- Song: Marvin Gaye "I want you" (*grin*)
- Shoe size: 10
- Salad Dressing: Blue cheese
- Sushi: Tuna at the Mayfair.
- Strawberries/Blueberries: Both. Strawberries with chocolate definitely :)

T
- Tattoos: Panda (in the near future)
- Time for bed: Lately anytime after 9. It varies

U
- Unpredictable: changes

V
- Vacation spot(s): Treasure Beach

W
- Weakness: Anything chocolate and Super Mario
- Which one of your friends acts the most like you? Hmmmm.........all of them have a little of me
- Worst feeling: Being worried
- Worst Weather: Unbearable heat.

X
- X-Rays: A lot. Cant even remember all the codes/names of them. Lol

Y
- Year it is now: 2009 baby!
- Yellow: Is nice. PINK is better :)

Z
- Zoo animal: Iguana. They are the nicest lizards.

Sending some Birthday love

"Thoughts From a Fabulous Mind" sending a special shoutout to one of my
#1 readers on her birthday.
Peace & Luv-Keeta :)

Doing Whatever When You Feel Like it

I was thinking to myself the other day that I have been really poor about updating my blog lately. And it's not that I don't love it but lately I've been about instant gratification and let me explain why.

For the past 8 months I have been doing a concentrated amount of work (in addition to the million other things I do) on my research paper for my Masters. Having finally reached a fabulous bright and sunny corner on that road, I have decided to take it easier and if I don't feel like doing something, I won't. Not forever of course *smile* just for a little while so I can remember what it's like to live to your own whim and fancy with the simplest of things. Over the past week I have been doing just that. Of course, in order to do this successfully you will need to make certain allowances for time, work, assignments so that you don't run into a hole with deadlines and such. But it will be worth it.

Give yourself all the things you want for a while and enjoy the feeling. Comfort, joy, excitement, whatever. And don't necessarily mean anything material either. Instead of running to do morning chores on the weekend take the time to sit and play Pacman on your phone and not feel guilty. Remember there's nothing wrong with self-indulgence. But as with all things and more importantly indulgence once some moderation is exercised you"ll be fine.

The only royalty you will ever need to cater to is yourself so spoil yourself and live like the queen you are, if only for a few days.

Peace and Luv
-Keeta

Putting your quirks to work

I had an interesting conversation with my friend about my penchant for the cute, fluffy and anything having to do with Winnie-The-Pooh. The conversation had to do with the fact that she had been struggling to finish her Bachelor's for a couple years because at times she did not have the necessary focus or drive to push. she continued saying that she was proud of how I stuck to my goals and finally completed my Masters. I was flattered but I knew all of those feelings she expressed to me. I gave her some advice (related to my Pooh obsession) that I thought I could share.

We all have quirks. Little things we do or like that are unique to just us (Mine as I noted earlier was anything having to do with Pooh bear, anything sickeningly cute or pink) So how does one do this?

• Well for the college student who may have tonnes of reading to do, especially for a course that is not in the least bit fun or inspiring- if stickers are your thing then put some pretty on that book. Another trick is to use a nice pen or a new highlighter. We all like nice new things. And get a pencil/pen/higlighter that's in your favourite colour.
• If you are someone who can do a bit of multi-tasking while studying/reading make sure to load some songs that you simply cannot get enough of on to your MP3 player and have a good listen while you do some of your reading.
• Snacks are always a welcome addition, keep a bit of the things you like to munch on around you studying is more fun. Even if it is Kid Cuisine cause you love the little mini-pizzas (Lol)

Focus is sometimes a scarce commodity but making the workspace one that you look forward to is a NECESSITY!!!! Make it reflect you. If you like candles light candles. Wear your Hello Kitty socks so that you feel comfortable and you have that extra happy, thus you would have given yourself that energy to get the work done. These are but a few suggestions but essentially anything you would do to make your space more you do that for your workspace. The average college student does most of his/her work outside of the lecture room and on his/her own so you should at least enjoy it.

If you know there are little things that people may laugh at or think you're crazy for, let them laugh. You are being productive and getting stuff done and at the end of the day noone can argue with that :) plus what better way to appreciate and pay homage to your God-given quirks and whims.

Peace & Luv
Keeta

Cutting off My Identity

Now I know the title of this one may cause you to wonder what is she talking about? Nothing naughty by the way, in case you were wondering (and if you were hoping for naughty well I apologize) Before I get into what I mean? I'll ask you a question? What is it that defines you? Have the answer? Good (if you don't, not to worry, just give it some more thought) Now, suppose you didn't have that anymore, what would you do? How would you feel? If it was a part of your physical appearance, does it connect in someway to your personality?

Now that you've thought on that I will tell you what I am talking about. For years I had long hair. Pretty much I defined myself by my hair. And then I decided to cut off. Almost all of it. I must admit that there were some influences connnected to my Masters research paper that also influenced the decision. How so you may ask? Well in Jamaica, I am often judged (overly so) by how I look. Browning with long hair i.e. people immediately think uptown priss. So I chopped it off, followed by not wearing any makeup at all in the days anymore. Not only have I had to adjust the morning routine to get ready and how I self-style my hair, but I have also adjusted how preoccupied I am about outward appearances because where I'll be collecting data people would be quick to assume. So while I can't do much about my skintone. I adjusted the Keeta that everyone was used to. This was my decision. My supervisor never said you need to do this, but I must admit I'm sure the change didn't hurt either. So even though its just hair, I have developed a new identity of sorts. I'm a little more mellow and for now taking a nice break from the super girly-girl I have always been. But not for too long. It's who I am deep down but right now, since the focus needs to be more serious, I decided to cut off my identity *grin*. Revamping is always a good idea anyway. Now I can evolve as it grows back. Who wouldn't love a fresh start like that?

Peace & Luv
-Keeta :)

Lacking agency?

This too was another post on my other former blog. It's more topical than the other things I write about but I hope you'll appreciate it just the same.

I had a very interesting conversation with someone who is an expert of sorts in Disaster Studies. I sought to get his take on the situation in One Bridge and how the residents cope. What I got however, was advice to not study this because there is nothing that persons residing in informal settlements can do to cope. I was surprised by his reaction. My surprise continued when he also advised me not to speak to the residents but to approach the issue from purely an administration perspective i.e. find out why the government does nothing about the issue of informal settlements even though they are aware of the problem and the corresponding effects.
I politely listened. I was left momentarily wondering what is the real issue here? Mark you what I just noted is only a snippet of the "advice"he gave me. In short I was told I was doing nothing that hadn't been done already. But if that really is the case, why then is there no literature or formal discourse on how informal settlers cope with the issues associated with their status?

I was actually surprised at his notion that all of these persons lack agency in their situation and just sat and allowed things to happen to them. It is common knowledge that Jamaicans never sit and just let thing happen to them. They adapt and invent. So in a way, a wise person whose advice I consult many times (who has done a significant amount of work in related areas) held true. Someone needs to look at the problem from the opposite end of the spectrum. We are too quick to write persons off and not understand issues from the perspective of the actual people they affect. And even if it has been asked, it has been barely recorded in a manner which would satisfy the need for such information.

Every story has two sides. Having one, now I will search for the other.

Keep thinking
-Nakeeta

Life in SIMulation

Over the past week, I have spent countless hours playing my newest acquisition Sims 3. Having always heard friends speak of how addictive the game was, naturally, with very peaked interest, when I was offered a copy I jumped at it.

Experts may psychoanalyse the extreme interest in creating and controlling almost every aspect of a person's life, down to how they flirt with a romantic interest. But save for my sub-surface control issues (which I have already acknowledged earlier in life) there is something that has been on my mind. What if life were like the Sims?

Cheat codes for free real estate, endless money and perfect moods. Simulated perfection. Pun intended. The game took on a new life for me after discovering these cheats.
While I acknowledge my friend's rebuffing of my use of cheats (it was in fact her reaction that inspired this piece), I thought it humorous nevertheless that she was telling me this while her Sim was a professional thief. She chided me and said she would work hard at her career (lol) and get rich the "normal"way not by cheat codes. The irony.

So what is it I want to philosphize about regarding this game? In the daily grind of things, perhaps being able to plan my life as I see it via Sims (cheat codes and all) will not only allow for endless hours of stress-relief and fun, but allow for some very helpful visualization. Life as I would like iy, or maybe have dreamed it. The successful woman-mother, career woman, sexy wife or even the lonely, hopeless romantic thief who loves to go fishing, searching for a mate. And at least if I ever wonder about the taboo things in life, I have a ready avenue through my life in simulation.

Peace & luv girlies
-Keeta :)

Starting to Figure Out the Truth

This post is a bit more topical than what I usually write about. I felt the need to discuss this so I decided to do it here.

Two months ago I began this journey, otherwise known as a Masters Research Paper, and along the way I noticed that there are a number of things which were happening in the quest to uncover the truth (sounds like a film epic) that I thought I should put out there.

I am studying informal settlements (aka squatting) and how it is that the persons cope with the various challenges they face as a result of squatting. Now I am aware that I could get more fundamental than that, and look at why it is these persons decided that living on the lower banks or even in the bed of a river was an acceptable risk, but for now I want to just know how it is they cope. Somehow intuition has led me to take a reverse approach to this.

On visiting the community I was studying, let's call it One Bridge, the first thing that hit me was this house that had slid into the river bed. An almost complete structure, someone's home. Gone. And don't be fooled, until a few years ago I assumed that informal settlements were only zinc and board structures. But people actually use more permanent building materials such as concrete, blocks and steel. That visit was in the final year of my undergraduate programme but it has stuck with me ever since.

These people who live here are just as much a part of normal life as the next person. Persons got to work, they send their children to school, they go to the market but still imagine what it must be like to sleep at night and wake up to the sound of torrential rain above your head. For some only the concern of a small leak might be the next thought, but for One Bridge residents the sneaking suspicion that you are about to be engulfed in dirty water and the debris it carries with it is all that consumes your mind.

This problem is not new to Jamaica. Squatting has been taking place for years. It has also been ignored for years. Hence, I was slightly amused at the hypocritical shock and amazement that ensued at the Minister of Housing's announcement that almost 1/3 of our population are informal settlers. That hypocritical shock is however the typical reaction to announcements regarding a lot of our problems. Why? Because, very often, too often in fact, we ignore, sit and wait and attack symptoms of problems and not the more fundamental issues behind them.

So here I am, studying this issue and in trying to organize my thoughts I have decided that I should put what is in my head all out there. I mean at the end of the day, each step in what started as just a research paper is now a much more than that.........I'm just trying to figure out the truth.

Keep thinking.
-Nakeeta

Titbits on Venting for the Unavoidable Drama of Daily Life

Like any thing that has gathered too much air or extra baggage, so is our emotional threshold. Lately, I have gained new appreciation for the need to vent and by extension vegetate (I will explain what I mean by that in a minute). It has also occurred to me in recent times, how difficult it is to extract yourself from the midst of drama short of being a hermit. Well, sans the details, I will explain how it is that I have subtracted that drama and sought to vent and vegetate thus preserving and (perhaps increasing) my sanity.

Now, for any 20-something drama seems to be almost inevitable. And this could mean just about anything. Drama for me is any unnecessary, unplanned and unwelcome event that seeks to distract from, distress and destroy that peace-of-mind I have come to cherish so much. And like most other things in life, drama also has varying levels. The drama I am speaking of particularly, is any looming thing, whether personal or professional that you have to make an even more concerted effort than usual to cope with, get over or get rid off.

But not to worry girlies, I come bearing gifts or hopefully, as I think of it, wisdom. The last 4 months of my life have seen quite its fair share of drama. And through trial and error (lots I might add) I have finally learnt exactly what it is you need to do to deal:

MAINTAINING SANITY WHEN THINGS AREN'T SO BAD
1. Vegetate. This simply means that for about 2-3 hours you are going to do something which requires little or no mental energy and will not cause you to get worked up or think about whatever it is that is bothering you. A very simple one to resort to is for those of us girls who are little on the geek side, video games will more than accomplish that for you. And better yet, mindless television (with the abundance of reality shows on tv now, you should have no problems there). My personal favourite is Spongebob.

2. Write. Write how you feel. Sound the words out in your head as you write them. With each word a little bit of your peace-of-mind of will return.

3. Colour. Now this one is a personal favourite. I suggested it to my doctor 3 years ago and she completely agreed wih me. Colouring books are not just for kids anymore. Colour outside the lines; colour things in shades they would never be in real life (dolphins might actaully look nicer in pink. *smile*) And who cares what persons might think if you decide to walk around with 2 cartoon colouring pages and a ziploc bag of Crayolas. You are doing this for yourself!!!


IF AT ABSOLUTE BREAKING POINT
1. Bawl. No not cry, you heard me right. BAWL! And the worse the issue, the bigger the bawl. Why am I encouraging crying you ask? Because this is the easiest method to get rid of baggage. Hence the need to insert it in most if not all movies aimed at a female demographic. Now this step along with a few others I will mention usually work in conjunction with something else. Cry with something you like very much, whether your favourite CD playing, sitcom on television or hugging a ratty stuffed animal. Though you may not want to be around other people there is no reason you should be without an essential favourite thing. Now wash your face and pull your chin up. Time to move on!!

2. Scream. That scream in the pillow trick is no joke. It does actually work. Really. And better yet, screaming without the pillow is just as fruitful (just make sure you will be the only one to hear it). Now a word of caution, scream at intervals so that you won't suffer from a horrible headache after and the results will be just as rewarding.

3. Stop caring. Now before you jump to conclusions, what I mean by this is that you need to not pay attention to all the other things that are holding you back. Just let whatever is be that way and you deal with your thing.

4. Find your guru and talk. Now this may just be exactly what you need especially if it's some encouragement and reassuring will help you get through the drama. Tell it all to that one person and take solace in a spare pair of shoulders for that moment. (NOTE: this is also good for when you're not at breaking point as well).

The most important way to cope however, is to develop your own quirks. My suggestions may work yes (and my lists are by no means exhaustive) but I'm sure you have things that you do that may seem weird or funny but make you feel better or even perfect.. Love those things. And at the end of the day, remember nothing else that you're doing will ever work as well as you planned it to, if at the core of it all YOU are not feeling FABULOUS!!

Peace & luv girlies
-Keeta :)

Voting for the Earth

Hi everyone. On March 28, 2009 I'm asking all of my fabulous readers to support the World Wildlife Funds Earth Hour. This initiative is to encourage persons all across the world to switch their lights off between 8:30 and 9:30 p.m. to show their support for the fight against global warming.

So be Fabulous and support a cause which is supporting the world which gives us life.

Peace and luv :)
-Keeta

Epiphany in Awkwardness

Now I love my friends. They are some of the sweetest and most interesting people that I have been fortunate to meet, but there is a serious problem I have at some point or the other with friends.It may seem that I usually know what to say in most situations but I have been "lucky" to be given the gift of choking in certain situations. What are these? Well, pretty much in situations of death, severe disappointment or worry. What happens? Well, Keeta is silent and then feels a profound sense of awkwardness at not being able to do anything to abate the situation and she chokes. Choking involves not calling the person or if in conversation with them, trying really hard to think of something else. I have always been aware of the problem, as it were, and how this may seem like I'm leaving someone who expects to be present, feeling like I've left them cold turkey. And so with the choking comes the guilt.

But yesterday, I had an epiphany of sorts. My friend told me that she was dealing with a situation which was tentative at best. I listened as she explained to me what it was and realised that it was one of those classic choke causers. But I didn't run, nor did I try to change the subject. I simply said to her that I was going to think of her some more, put some good karma out there for her and say an extra prayer. Usually, I think these statements are futile and don't actually make the person feel better, so I've pretty much been averse to saying them. But yesterday, when I actually used them, my friend really did sound like it gave her a little push to keep her chin up. And when I heard that I remembered that at the end of the day sometimes you don't even need to say or be able to do anything to really have something count. You just have to care. And I guess she probably knew that it may have been awkward for me but was grateful that someone listened and was hoping for the best for her as well. So if you've ever felt like you're about to choke and want to run and hide, try keeping your chin up and things will be a lot easier to swallow.

Peace and luv :)

Choosing Battles and Honey

Have you ever noticed changes in yourself? Well recently I have noticed a few changes of my own. Being a fairly, stubborn and usually very strong-willed person, I don't let things go to easily in a fight when I know I'm on the right side of the chalk line. Or worse when I have to do something that is simply for your own piece of mind that others may not agree with. But lately, the Keeta has discovered a simpler way of getting her way. Don't get me wrong if you need to stand your ground with something, don't back down. Worse if it is something very important. However, I have learnt the value of not always trying to explain something to persons who are dogmatic at best, obdurate at worst. And more importantly the value of honey. The honey I speak of is not nature's confection, but the figurative one.

Kimora Lee Simmons, in her book "Fabulosity", passed on some very valuable information to yours truly- 'You catch more flies with honey than vinegar". Sounds simple right? Well not to me at first and I'll tell you why. I've heard that before but when I heard it from her, someone who is assertive, strong and unapologetic for it, I decided to believe. And I have learnt the reasoning that goes with it. The last two weeks, I have been in situations where persons whom I have had interactions with whether work-related or otherwise have said things or held points-of-view that I haven't agreed with. So I took a minute, assessed whether or not to argue and 9 times out of 10 realised that it really wasn't worth it. On top of that, dropped in a smile and 9 times out of 10 I got my way anyway. Go figure.

Moral of the story is, the sticky sweetness almost always works better. So be sweet to yourself and choose your battles ;)

The Mystery of Inspiration

I was having a conversation today with someone whose opinion I truly value (one of my role models so to speak). We were discussing this blog somewhat and she asked me how often I made a post and I responded that I write when I am inspired. And of course, I thought back to the conversation (as I usually do with conversations which last longer than a few minutes) and I thought about inspiration.

Inspiration is said by many to be a divine gift, an epiphany of sorts. Many people are fully in tune with what inspires them. The various things or activities which cause them to produce works of varying types. Now while I may be able to say what in particular had inspired me to do something at a given time, I have realized that those same things may not exactly work at another again in the same way.

Then there is the mystery of what it is we may to be inspired to do. Or in my case, for example, the simple fact that I wait to be inspired to write which simply means inspiration (which if we operate on the premise that inspiration is a gift) must come for me to further develop my other gift- the writing. A little convoluted though it may seem, it got me thinking how much other persons at this stage of their life (20-something) have lost their inspiration or simply dont feel like they have any, because they may have ended up like a stunted stalagmite unable to receive more minerals from the larger structure above or they may have been wooed by flames a moth should otherwise ignore.

Why wait till you're 30, 40 or older to really be inspired to do more with you? Have you ever really sat and wondered if you are giving yourself the attention you deserve by finding that inspiration to find out more about you? And then is it really life and all it offers that you're searching for or the inspiration to really get up and chase it? Inspiration when you think about it can mean so many different things but really, like many other things in life, it is one of those things or gifts that when you get it you know it really only was meant for you.

The Sometimes Dreaded Valentine's Day

One of the things I have always appreciated in my life is the different perspectives the people around me have on almost everything. With February just starting, my mind ran on one of these persons and the take she had on Valentine's Day a couple years ago. She wore full black and reproached (jokingly, I should add) those of us who while we may not have been wearing red, decided to look extra cute on the day in an adorable powder blue dress with white peep-toe flats. I thought back to this and wondered, what really is the deal with Valentine's Day (and I don't mean the origins)? Most of the people who I know would rather wear full black and lament that there is nothing to get all excited about.

But indulge me for a second. Let's think about it from the other side. Now I am not saying you need to look like one of those GM tomatoes they sell in the supermarket and wear full red (or better yet PINK *wink*) nor am I saying that you have to have a special guy (or girl. I don't judge) to celebrate a day that has been branded in our minds by way of cupid, hearts, flowers and teddy bears. However.........I am all about deconstructing and reinterpreting those same things that society uses to define us in one way or the other.

Did you ever make Valentine cards for your parents or friends when you were little? If not don't worry, you'll know why I asked in a minute. Children do things just to show persons that they are loved (and there is very little if any romance happening at that stage). So I decided that even though Valentine's Day is traditionally for lovers *chuckle* I would make it into something that really meant something to me. So what did I do? In a bout of silly, I went on one knee and asked one of my best friends to be my Valentine. She nearly collapsed laughing. We decided that we would be extra nice to each other for this special day. Just something out of the ordinary. Plus, I decided that it had been a while since I had done something for my mother, who lately has been under a bit of stress from work, so I would do a special care package to send home to her as well. So what better way to take a day, designed for lovers (perhaps by Cupid, a saint or the capitalists in order to make money) and make it about the people who really count.

So for those of you who may be making a conscious effort to wear black and be grim, and reproach those of us who find any excuse to be cutesy and wear pink (yes I mean myself), forget being consciously against Valentine's Day and use it as that perfect opportunity to show somebody (who you know might need a pick-me-up) that they are extra special. It'll be so worth the energy you spend, that you may not even remember to wear black ;)

Beauty Fix-Its You Will Thank Me For

Hey girls. So guess what? Yours truly has been doing some research lately. Not the kind that goes in newpapers and parliament but the kind that has real instant gratification (the best kind).
This is Jamaica. Meaning two things: 1. That if you are in your early 20s your pay isn't anywhere where it should be to buy those essential things like a cute cotton tube dress (without the trek downtown) and 2. Makeup essentials don't have those nice prices like those in the land of the "free" (pun intended). So what to do?
Here are my Top 7 beauty cheapies:

1. No eye-makeup remover? Tired of the pencil making your face look raccoon-esque in the morning after some fun? Well baby shampoo with no-more tears formula is where it's at. Works like a charm.

2. Is your pedi going? No time for a new coat of polish? A little oil around the cuticle and on the nail will do the trick for fresh looks for a couple more days.

3. Now you love that moisturizer right? But your hair is a little gunky at the end of the week. What to do? Soak your dry hair in apple cider vinegar (much cheaper than exfoliant at the salon) leave in for 15 minutes, rinse and shampoo as usual. This is where shine will happen.

4. Love that scent and the bottle's almost done? Knock the top off and pour the last bit of your favourite perfume in your lotion. And the scent will last even longer.

5. No shaving cream? Do NOT use soap. Use conditioner. Cheapest bottle of conditioner runs for about $100 JA, smells nice enough for the job it does and your legs will be OH SO AMAZING soft!!

6. Body scrub is tooooooo expensive. Make your own. Honey and brown sugar mixed together and rubbed on with a sponge. Take a bath, dry off, look and smell yummy.

7. This isnt completely related but wear more vanilla. Another pick of mine, coconut *wink* Why? Men like that scent most on women. Figures it would be something related to food. Lol. Best thing both are super reasonable compared to a bottle of Curve or Baby Phat Golden Goddess.

Now you are more educated. So go forth and be HOTTTTT!!!!

Four Friend Inspired Feel-goods

The first month of the year is almost done. What's the situation with the New Year resolutions and all those plans? Keeping on track or falling a little behind? Well here's the thing...........you still have plenty of time and I decided to give my two cents to my faithful few who have been craving that feel good about you no matter what state of mind you're in.

These are things I have learnt from some of my fave girls (see if you can figure out who these people are ;))

1. Feeling bored? I learnt this from a "steely" girl. Put on some popping lipstick and take some banging pictures of yourself (self-timer is a girl's favourite button) Not even for Facebook either. Just do it for you. Print the best one, frame it and put it in your room or send it right to your phone.

2. A certain articulate songstress, has the scoop on the RIGHT way to wear a t-shirt (that is not too big of course). Now some freshly pampered feet in some cute gladiators will do the trick. Cute without trying too hard. And as for the feet pampering, just soak your feet in some warm water with shampoo (yes I said shampoo) and buff with a pumice stone. Shampoo and a pumice stone will last longer than all the time, effort and $$$ it will take for a few pedicures and right now low maintenance is where it's at.

3. Now this one I was reminded of just the other day, when you miss a friend who is a big part of your days and they're not around at the time. What's the best way to cheer yourself up? Do the favourite thing you did together and leave a note, msg online, or comment on their profile to let them know they are being missed. Pancakes anyone?

4. Last one, (for now anyway) (pretty personal I might add) what to do when you think you need a REALLY good pick-me-up after one of those looooooonnnnnggggggg weeks and there is no date or plan? Listen here time to LOVE YOU. When last have you really spent the evening with your favourite person i.e. YOU? Put on your fave movie, or watch some good sitcom marathons on Comedy Central , TBS, make yourself some chicken breast with a little pasta, paint your toes that favourite colour and just RELAX. I guarantee you'll be glad you did.

The Value of a "Second Opinion"

So I was on Facebook the other day and I read something very interesting in someone's status message. In a nutshell it was saying that as humans we don't really know ourselves and, when we want to know or find out more about ourselves as persons we ask others.

I immediately thought about it and looked back at instances in the past when I have asked someone (whose opinion I valued of course ) what they thought of me. Whether a particular characteristic or me in general. I also thought about if I have been a fair judge of myself enough to adequately assess whatever response I may receive to the "What do you think of me?" question. And then there are so many other questions tied in to that.

How well do we really understand ourselves as persons and are we able to see ourselves in the "right" light when it matters most? Do we hold firm to the core of who we are in spite of adapting to changes. Or is it that the core itself needs to be changed?

If you really know yourself, do you need to ask someone else what they think?

Is self-comprehension really like a trip to the doctor? How valuable is that "second opinion"?

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